It's been raining on and off all day, in fact, with the appropriate thunder. This time we're having a storm the radar says isn't there. :-) At least on the screen it looks like the storm is going south of us on its way east, but thunder is still rattling the panes and making Willow woof.

Been a depressing day anyway. Mom is obviously hurting, but this afternoon she started to protest about taking her pills again. She finally let slip that it was a bit difficult drinking the water. Right now I don't know if it's because she's been drinking from a straw that I'm holding most of the time, and I'm not pulling it away on time, or if her swallowing reflex is actually shutting down. The latter is a clear sign she is deteriorating, according to both the nurse and the book I read.

It's silly, but what I really mind—aside from the most important problem that she's in pain—is that when she is contrary like this she calls me names. Not bad names and I know she doesn't mean it, but it's upsetting to be told to go away and that I'm a "pain in the ass." All I want to do is what's good for her, and she knows that, but the pain muddles her.

I have discussed that with the nurse, and she says she will get a prescription for a higher-dose pain patch again. This will help keep the pain corralled. The nurse says it's hard, but that if Mom refuses the medicine I should just come back later. When the pain is bad enough she will take the medication, and I have something I can give her if the swallowing really is a problem. But it's hard to wait and know she's hurting, too.

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. . . . . noted and logged by Linda at 5:12:00 PM

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